The Negativity Drift

Last lesson, you assessed your positivity. We all have a tendency to focus on what’s not working–our thoughts often drift to the negative. Now we’ll discuss ways to disrupt this pattern.

Watch Daniel Goleman and George Kohlrieser, Professor of Leadership and Organizational Behavior at the International Institute for Management Development (IMD), a business school based in Lausanne Switzerland, discuss positivity and leadership.

80% of people focus on what’s wrong, what’s not working, or what’s failing. In order to be an inspiring and influential leader, you need to learn how to see opportunities even amid challenging situations.

Turning Toward Optimism

What aspects of positivity come easily and naturally for you? What do you need to focus on to improve your positive outlook?

• How often do you see the good in others? Is that different from seeing the good in situations? Are they similar or different for you?
• Can you see the light at the end of the tunnel?
• When you get bogged down in negative thoughts or emotions, can you remind yourself to see the positive or ask what the silver lining is?
• Do you use positive language and/or reframe situations for others?

Here is an example of using positive language: Kate took a role as Vice Dean at a medical school. She was new to the institution and no one had been in the role for almost a year. It was safe to say there was a real need for leadership. She asked her administrator, Amy, to set up meetings with different constituents so she could get a feel for what was going on. Amy remembers every meeting was the same. The new Vice Dean would ask people what they thought she should focus on first, and attendees would tell her many things going wrong that needed attention. At the end of every meeting Kate would tell the group with an authentic smile, “I can’t wait to get to work with you, we have so many opportunities at this institution,” and then would go around the table to shake everyone’s hand and thank them for coming.

After the first week, Amy couldn’t help herself and she asked the new Vice Dean how she could keep using the word “opportunities” in every meeting when so many areas obviously required attention. The Vice Dean looked at her and said, “I truly do believe they are opportunities. Right now we can only go forward and improve things–lucky for us they can’t get worse–what an opportunity for early wins.” Amy will admit she used the word “opportunity” sarcastically for the next year as they did the tough work of improving the institution’s processes, but she finally came around and now finds herself pointing out the “opportunities” to others who want to focus on the negative. Language choices do make a difference.

Think about the following words and phrases. What comes to mind when you hear them?

• Weaknesses
• Constructive criticism
• Areas for further development
• Opportunities for growth

Action Step

Language makes a difference. Reflect on your language choices. What did the people you interviewed share with you about your language? Think of a conversation you need to have in the next day: what positive language can you choose to incorporate to display your positive outlook?

Consider sharing with others that you are experimenting with positive language choices and ask them to let you know when you did well and/or when you had an opportunity to make a different, more positive, choice.

Throughout the day, pay attention to your language choices and assess how well you do based on the amount of positive language you use.

Reflect on how you experience emotional contagion in groups or work teams you are currently a part of. For example, are there people who create a positive or negative energy within the group? Can you identify what behaviors, body language, or tone of voice they use that is so impactful?

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